This is starting to happen a bit more, so I thought it might be useful to jot down a FAQ. On the other hand, I tend to be a bit conflicted, so this FAQ might not make a lot of sense.
What does Sally like about calling ceilidhs?
- I like lots of people having fun dancing, and the smug feeling I made that happen
- I like being the centre of attention, and compliments afterwards ;-)
- I really really like ceilidhs, so I like being someone who makes more ceilidhs happen, in a 'pass it on' kind of way.
- Calling is good fun, I like doing it. I like thinking about the ability of the dancers, and the mood, and how tired they are, and the band, and trying to pick cute and unusual dances.
What doesn't Sally like about calling ceilidhs?
- I don't like too much pressure. I've gently steered away from wedding ceilidhs because of the fear around 'this is the Most Important Event of My Life and you called it badly'
- I don't like not being able to dance. I like dancing much more than I like calling, if I end up calling all the time I do less dancing.
- I don't like not being able to spend time with my friends. If it's a party or event that i would otherwise be invited to, spending the whole evening calling is different to dancing most dances and hanging around and chatting a bit.
- I don't like stressing about money. By which I mean, I've entirely lived on pay as you earn tax and not worrying. I'm very pro-tax, so I don't think I'd be comfortable just taking money for calling in cash and not paying tax on it. But I'm very anti-faff, so I really don't want to have to start doing Accounts, and Tax Returns, just because I called three ceilidhs in a year and earnt about 100 quid. I don't know what the law is about things like 'give money to charity and I'll do this' or 'just pay my travel expenses and give me a bottle of wine', but it feels slightly against my pro-tax stance? On the other hand, I believe in things like unions, and a fair wage for fair work, and don't want to be accidently undercutting all the hard working callers who need to be paid to survive.
- I don't like causing faff, if a band usually comes with a caller. If you're booking a band that have a regular caller they usually work with, I would much rather you used them than broke up a regular thing to use me.
- I'm not sure how good I am yet. I have done a lot of calling for clever Cambridge types who do a lot of folk dance. I haven't done a lot of calling for people who don't do a lot of dancing. This is a skill I want to build up, but it's something that makes me a bit nervous. Hence the mostly-avoiding wedding ceilidhs thing.
- I don't have any PA yet. You may find out it is nearly as expensive and faffy just to hire a microphone and speakers as it is to hire a caller with their own PA. I really should try and get some (hmm, it's my 30th soon, maybe that would be a sensible thing to ask for... I want a microphone you can walk about with - maybe even a crazy head mic so you can dance! - and just a speaker to make it loud... but I don't know much about PA)
So, will Sally call your ceilidh?
- If she isn't busy already, and is expecting to be vaguely in the right place at the right time, the answer is almost certainly yes. But...
- she doesn't have any PA, and would like at least a microphone.
- she likes dancing and being sociable, and would be happier to call only half a ceilidh
- she is only an amateur, and while she calls quite good ceilidhs this isn't her day job. If everyone ends up out of time with the music and each other, err, she's still learning.
What does Sally like about calling ceilidhs?
- I like lots of people having fun dancing, and the smug feeling I made that happen
- I like being the centre of attention, and compliments afterwards ;-)
- I really really like ceilidhs, so I like being someone who makes more ceilidhs happen, in a 'pass it on' kind of way.
- Calling is good fun, I like doing it. I like thinking about the ability of the dancers, and the mood, and how tired they are, and the band, and trying to pick cute and unusual dances.
What doesn't Sally like about calling ceilidhs?
- I don't like too much pressure. I've gently steered away from wedding ceilidhs because of the fear around 'this is the Most Important Event of My Life and you called it badly'
- I don't like not being able to dance. I like dancing much more than I like calling, if I end up calling all the time I do less dancing.
- I don't like not being able to spend time with my friends. If it's a party or event that i would otherwise be invited to, spending the whole evening calling is different to dancing most dances and hanging around and chatting a bit.
- I don't like stressing about money. By which I mean, I've entirely lived on pay as you earn tax and not worrying. I'm very pro-tax, so I don't think I'd be comfortable just taking money for calling in cash and not paying tax on it. But I'm very anti-faff, so I really don't want to have to start doing Accounts, and Tax Returns, just because I called three ceilidhs in a year and earnt about 100 quid. I don't know what the law is about things like 'give money to charity and I'll do this' or 'just pay my travel expenses and give me a bottle of wine', but it feels slightly against my pro-tax stance? On the other hand, I believe in things like unions, and a fair wage for fair work, and don't want to be accidently undercutting all the hard working callers who need to be paid to survive.
- I don't like causing faff, if a band usually comes with a caller. If you're booking a band that have a regular caller they usually work with, I would much rather you used them than broke up a regular thing to use me.
- I'm not sure how good I am yet. I have done a lot of calling for clever Cambridge types who do a lot of folk dance. I haven't done a lot of calling for people who don't do a lot of dancing. This is a skill I want to build up, but it's something that makes me a bit nervous. Hence the mostly-avoiding wedding ceilidhs thing.
- I don't have any PA yet. You may find out it is nearly as expensive and faffy just to hire a microphone and speakers as it is to hire a caller with their own PA. I really should try and get some (hmm, it's my 30th soon, maybe that would be a sensible thing to ask for... I want a microphone you can walk about with - maybe even a crazy head mic so you can dance! - and just a speaker to make it loud... but I don't know much about PA)
So, will Sally call your ceilidh?
- If she isn't busy already, and is expecting to be vaguely in the right place at the right time, the answer is almost certainly yes. But...
- she doesn't have any PA, and would like at least a microphone.
- she likes dancing and being sociable, and would be happier to call only half a ceilidh
- she is only an amateur, and while she calls quite good ceilidhs this isn't her day job. If everyone ends up out of time with the music and each other, err, she's still learning.
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FWIW, from what I remember, I think you were very good at being clear (including understanding what people who've been dancing for <50 years may need defined occasionally) for comparative beginners, funny and non-pushy, but I obviously can't speak for how good you are at choosing dances, not making mistakes, etc :)
I don't think I'd be comfortable just taking money for calling in cash and not paying tax on it.
I really should know the answer to this question. In fact, I hate paperwork and am really awful at being organised, so I've no idea. But I thought there was in fact some lower bound on what you pay tax on specifically so that if you get £100 for a one-off thing you don't have to fill in a whole pile of forms? But surely someone here knows, lots of people do freelance stuff (music, programming, etc) -- it seems worth finding out so you don't have to worry about it, because it's bound to come up in our lives occasionally.
(FWIW my assumption is that you can be reimbursed for expenses and that doesn't count as being paid, but gifts DO count at their market value, but as I say, there may be exceptions where you don't have to count them. But obviously, you shouldn't listen to random guesses, you should wait for someone who actually knows :))
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[But clearly 'please give me a bottle of booze because I can't be bothered to work out how to pay tax' is a very mild version of 'please pay me in cash so I don't have to pay tax', and given I'm rich enough to be able to afford the principles I should try my best to have them...]
Thank you for the kind words about my calling!
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There are some fairly strict rules surrounding what expenses are claimable. Travel expenses are usually OK, as long as it was money you spent solely to allow you to earn the income and not for other purposes (e.g. visiting a friend - that's a well known loophole, now closed). Boxes 16 through 20 on the main tax return form SA100 refer, along with the attendant guides on filling it in. It is imperative that you keep documentary evidence of your expenses in case you are audited (e.g. receipts for train tickets, journey/mileage log if you drive); you'll need to hang on to these for up to 7 years.
I suspect that if your earnings are more than a small amount (I know not what this mystical threshold might be) they'd want you to declare them as self-employment income, but in a sense that'd be a nice problem to have.
In the first instance you should either write to or ring HMRC to tell them you have received freelance income that is not fully taxed at source in a particular tax year. (You can do this as soon as you've earned the income.) They will probably respond with a form letter telling you they are going to start sending you tax returns. They may also want to know in advance how much you think you will earn this way, so that they can start assessing you for provisional tax; if so, that's tax paid up front which works itself out after the end of each tax year when you send in the return.
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They really ought to teach this kind of thing in schools...
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Sadly, I also do workshops for which I invoice people, and that does require me to declare self employed. Even though I still make a loss overall...
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That's interesting. When this happened to me a few years ago I found various boxes on the tax return that looked possibly like what you're describing here, but none of them seemed to be clearly applicable based on the detailed wording, so I gave up and phoned HMRC's helpline. I described the facts of the case and asked how I should translate them into tax-return-boxes, and they told me I should do a full-on self-employment page, so I did that (and – possibly as a result? – paid NI as well as income tax on the money).
Perhaps they told me that because the money in question was a little more than we're discussing here. (I can't remember whether I actually told them how much it was when I rang the helpline. If I didn't, then perhaps they told me that because it was the safe option if the amount was uncertain...) But if there is a box I could have used legally with less hassle, then I'm faintly annoyed that I didn't manage to find that out and do it!
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Everything else on your excellent list looks totally reasonable for everyone to know and take on board. I admire your honesty.
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[Also, I think there is a Ginger Biscuit risk as well, if you work for the public sector, and get seen doing something technically naughty it can have big career impacts. It's not my personal call that the government shouldn't care about my calling because it's not cost effective, it's the governments.]
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http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/mps-expenses/5319360/Austin-Mitchells-letter-to-the-Telegraph-on-MPs-expenses.html
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Crazy head mics are cool gadgets. If you get one it might have pose value when giving presentations, too!
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You couldn't take the stance that in this case the government as made it both legal not to pay that tax and impractical to pay it, so it's their loss?
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FWIW, the limit on not paying extra NI is about £5000 from your self-employment.
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It may well be illegal for the ceilidh to pay you at all if they aren't registered for PAYE unless you send them an appropriate invoice to make the whole thing traceable.
An interesting question is, 'I gave my neighbour a bottle of wine I brought back from my holiday in France to thank her for looking after my cat over the weekend. Assuming we do no further documentation, how many and which laws did we break?'.
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The tax question is interesting.
My gut response is, it's an insignificant amount of money per year.
But then I am with you on the pro tax thing. And I do stuff like buy my petrol and packet of sweets on separate cards so the fuel goes on my trade account and the food on personal, routinely, even though it's a pain. Having said that once a year or so I can't be bothered, but that's about £2.50, and at least not a routine error for accountants to be annoyed at. Everything else goes through my accounts, but given I have the tax return nightmare anyway it isn't any more effort for it to.
If I were you I'd either take cash and give a portion to charity, assuming it's less than, say, £200 or so per year or less than £50/transaction. -ie not worth the effort of the accounts.
However given your worries about doing that I'd just ask the person to give to charity on your behalf and cover transport as a reasonably and easy solution.
I wouldn't feel bad about a gift/bottle etc if it's from a friend - see Pete's cat comment on that!!
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I am probably substantially less good than you, with probabably a much more slap-dash attitude to getting it right, and a smaller repertoire. But I'm okay.
Entirely with you on the mic. Have you ever tried to call a ceilidh for about drunk 60 light entertainers without a mic, and with musical accompaniment consisting of a improvised band of kitchen appliances? [The amp broke]. Bellowing abuse shuts people up, so you can get on with the calling. But that technique is probably less appropriate in other contexts.
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Hugs lovely Sally
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